Pinot This and Pinot That

April 17, 2011

A few years ago I idly googled the number of wine grape varieties and got a list over 200 hundred long. Even though I was in the wine business in the 1990’s for a few disastrous years, and had read extensively and often boringly on the subject, I was stunned. It took me back to the winter of 1973-74 when I was a wine waiter in Union City, N.J. and was absorbing much about wine at the same time I was absorbing much wine. More of that in another post. But I was reminded of the awful snobbery that often attached itself to even the most ill educated drinkers. It called for a poem, and here it is:-

Pinot This and Pinot That

Pinot this and pinot that
This young Grenache is a trifle flat
Better to try and get along
With a slightly older Sauvignon

I sometimes get a trifle low
When dabbling in a cheap Merlot
And so to scare the blues away
Will sip a spendy Chardonnay

But to avoid real ennui
Drink super Oregon Pinot Gris
And let’s be quite awfully frank
That’s much better than Chenin Blanc

But while you sort out your Pinot
Give a break to Grignolino
It’s good, but not the same as
A bold and cheeky Oz Shiraz

And if you want to go very far
Don’t ignore local Pinot Noir
It always sells well on the block
And I wonder who likes Marechal Foch

As I was supping a cute Barbera
At a certain State affaira
Things got quickly very highbrow
When someone mentioned Muller Thurgau

It is no lack of vinous respect
That makes us scorn the best Malbec
And can you find me a single fan
Of that very odd vine, Carignan?

If one must go to a grapey hell
There’s good company in Zinfandel
But if we really must go
Could we have some Nebbiolo?

In the end we all agree
Any wine is better free
But if not free we’ll surely call
Any wine beats none at all!

I hope this explains something…


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